Horizontal refreshments

The cold, during the winter night, is very severe, and the sentinels are frequently obliged to be relieved every half-hour, and the officers, so long as they possess the "prima flora juvenus," may enjoy horizontal refreshments in peace; but when they obtained those manly appendages, yclept whiskers, find that turing in bed becomes hopeless, and being "brought up with a round turn," discover that they have become frozen to the sheets.

Here at The Federalist, we talk about sex a lot as is. Join us this week for some additional fun and deep-thinking about, well, you know — dancing in the sheets, horizontal refreshments, the beast with two backs, Blitzkrieg mit dem fleischgewehr, gland to gland combat, and more.